Weddings

AAAH , wedding – the necessary evil. People have mixed feelings towards weddings and they say all sorts of stuff about them. Surely, I’m no expert in the subject, but hey I’ve attended a lot of wedding ceremonies – so it’s safe to say that I’ve some expertise in attending weddings! (Err… not as the bridegroom, of course.)

Weddings used to be fun when I was a kid. Maybe that’s because I wasn’t that cynical back then or didn’t feel miserable all the time. Just roaming around aimlessly, checking out the bride, trying to snatch away some delicacies – ahh, good times, good times. But as I grew up, attending weddings became a mere formality.

Weddings don’t have that ‘epic’ feeling anymore. Back then, weddings were something worth waiting for. We got to meet up with our relatives living in various parts of the country. Living under the same roof, playing silly games, having great foods all around the day – it isn’t the same anymore.

Now, we are so busy with our lives, we hardly ‘celebrate’ weddings. We don’t stay with the relatives. We just visit them on a community center. We go there at around 7.30, give some gifts, have some random chitchat, then dinner at around 9, more chatter and we are back in our homes before 11. Sounds more like a corporate dinner party, than a wedding.

Whenever I hear that I’ve to attend a wedding, I feel sick in my stomach. Sure, the free food is always great, and you get to ogle at some beautiful girls – but that’s it! I mean, I wouldn’t talk with a girl even when she sits beside me in class, regardless of the hotness level, how am I supposed make use of this opportunity?!?!?!?

I feel miserable. I feel envious. Come on, a guy is surely going to get laid before dawn and I can’t even approach a girl! Well, moving on, besides, I have to spend the hours by staring at a wall or trying to eavesdrop on someone else’s ‘interesting’ conversation. What else am I supposed to do? Talk with the aunties about the latest hindi serials? Or play hide and seek with the kids? I am too old to steal the groom’s shoe!

So apart from the free food, I’ve nothing to look forward to on a wedding. I despise weddings – it makes me more miserable than I already am. And don’t get me started on the weddings you just ‘have to’ attend. Cause if you don’t someone will feel hurt! Oh, for crying out loud, who on earth would ‘miss’ me? And who will return all those hours I’ve spent staring at walls, huh?

Maybe I should get paid for attending weddings…